Concerned about Daughter's Weight

Dear Charlotte,

I am the mother of three and I have always had weight problems. My eldest daughter is a sophomore in college now and I can see that she is gaining weight. I try not to nag, or comment, but I just don’t want her to go through the same struggle that I have had my whole life.

Do you have any advice on how I can help my 19-year old stay slim?

Connie K.
Charlotte, NC

Dear Connie,

My advice to you is to focus on your own eating issues. So many daughters (and sons) develop unhealthy relationships with food because of unwitting and well-meaning parents. And just like all parenting, a child will model the behavior of the people they look up to… you!

Your daughter is a sophomore in college—19. She is probably under a lot of stress; she is undoubtedly eating poorly and probably not getting good regular exercise. But she is on the doorstep of adulthood, and she is in college to learn the life skills she will need to be a successful productive member of society. This is the opportunity for her to learn about taking care of herself.

Moreover, nagging, even talking casually about a teen’s eating habits and weight by a parent will almost certainly cause friction between the two of you, and perhaps cause a bit of rebellion and the opposite of what you want.

So, work on your own food issues, your emotional eating, and your general health. Be a good example to your daughter, and let her deal with her weight and eating habits on her own. When and if she wants to come to you to discuss this will you, be supportive, open, and non-judgmental.

…and when you send her a care package, include some healthier snacks like pretzels and dried fruits, granola bars and nuts! If she is like most college students, they will eat whatever is available, so make it healthy!

Give me a call at 800.496.7710 and we can start to work through the reasons you have always struggled with your own weight. I suspect that if we are able to address this, you will be better prepared to help your daughter when and if she asks, and at the very least you will be able to lead by example, and begin to lead a healthier life yourself.

All my best to you and your family. I look forward to speaking with you.

Charlotte Smith
Eating Consultant and Life Coach

Become The Real You will instruct you on how to listen to your own body. How to eat whatever you want to achieve and maintain your perfect body weight! No more diets, no drugs, no counting calories. It’s simple...and it works!

Become The Real You is a process is for anyone who:
--Is tired of yo-yo dieting
--Wants to return to their natural shape
--Wants to come to peace with food and their body
--Wants to lose weight permanently
--Wants freedom from food obsession

Contact Charlotte today to learn more at 800.496.7710

Emotional Eating

Dear Charlotte,

I have been reading your blog and I know that I am an emotional eater. I eat when I am sad…or depressed, or bored. Recently I went through a divorce and if my waistline is any indication, it seems to be getting worse.

How can I take control of my eating habits and maybe lose a few pounds?

Thomas J. FL

Dear Thomas,

Emotional eating is characterized as eating to console or sooth, as a way to deal with stress, anxiety, or depression--and going through a divorce is certainly a cause of all these things! Emotional eaters often turn to junk food and high calorie, or sugary snacks. Even though your emotions can be a trigger for eating, you can take certain steps to control these cravings.

Here are some ways to gain power over emotional eating:

1) Recognize your true hunger: Is your hunger physical or emotional? If you ate just a few hours ago and still have a full stomach, you're probably not really hungry. Are you really just bored or sad?

2) Recognize your triggers: Keep a food diary for a week and write down what you eat, when you eat, and how you're feeling before and after you eat. Do you only eat when hungry? Or do you find that you are snacking when you are stressed. Are there patterns in the time that you eat between meals or in why you are eating? Change the pattern and you are less likely to eat when you don’t need to.

3) Take a break: If you find yourself reaching for food in a stressful or frustrating moment, get up and go for a walk. Take a break from your work, or from sitting in front of the TV or computer—just get up and go do something different, fun, or relaxing.

4) Clean the cupboards: One of the secrets of slim people is that they do not keep a lot of junk food in the house. Don’t buy the bag of chips or keep high calorie snack foods in the cupboard. If you are feeling hungry between meals, you will be more likely to grab an apple or carrot sticks if this is what is available to you.

5) Don’t skip meals: You should eat when you are physically hungry. For you this might mean 5 smaller healthy meals throughout the day, or less, but wait until you are hungry. But if it is a meal-time and you are hungry, sit down and have a good meal. If you are full you will be less likely to grab the "bad-for-you" foods later if you are feeling down.

6) Take care of yourself: Get regular exercise and a good night’s sleep. You will be better able to deal with the stress in your life when you are healthy and well-rested.

If you do give in to emotional eating, do not dwell on it. Understand why, (a trigger or a skipped breakfast) and move on and face the next day. Celebrate the positive, healthy habits you are developing and the way the world opens up when you aren’t held back by emotional eating.

Please give me a call if I can be of assistance: 800.496.7710

Charlotte Smith
Eating Consultant and Life Coach

Become The Real You will instruct you on how to listen to your own body. How to eat whatever you want to achieve and maintain your perfect body weight! No more diets, no drugs, no counting calories. It’s simple...and it works!

Become The Real You is a process is for anyone who:
--Is tired of yo-yo dieting
--Wants to return to their natural shape
--Wants to come to peace with food and their body
--Wants to lose weight permanently
--Wants freedom from food obsession

Contact Charlotte today to learn more at 800.496.7710.

Dealing with Stress at Work

Dear Charlotte,

I have been dealing with a lot of stress at work, including long hours. I used to take walks on my lunch hour and eat healthfully, and now I just snack at my desk. During the last year I have gained a lot of weight, and I don’t feel as good about myself. When I get home I am so frustrated I just eat until I go to bed.

What should I do?

Michelle J.
New York

Dear Michelle,

For many people, food is a comfort when times are tough. It keeps us occupied, distracts us from facing difficult issues and consoles and sooths us when we are down.

But emotional eating, (eating as a way to suppress negative emotions, such as stress, anger, anxiety, boredom, sadness and loneliness) can lead to weight gain. And emotional eating often leads to eating too much, especially the higher calorie, sugary or salty foods that aren’t good for us.

The good news is that you have taken the first step to ending this cycle of emotional eating and taking control of your weight. You may not be able to change your stressful work environment, but you can change how you deal with it.

Your afternoon walks are a great place to start. The added exercise will help you clear your head and be able to deal with the afternoon better. You will be more productive, less stressed and the added benefit of being a great healthy habit that may help you lose a few of those unwanted pounds.

I would like to work with you more to help work through your emotional eating habits. If this is something you would be interested in, please give me a call at 800.496.7710.

Charlotte Smith
Eating Consultant and Life Coach

Become The Real You will instruct you on how to listen to your own body. How to eat whatever you want to achieve and maintain your perfect body weight! No more diets, no drugs, no counting calories. It’s simple...and it works!

Become The Real You is a process is for anyone who:
--Is tired of yo-yo dieting
--Wants to return to their natural shape
--Wants to come to peace with food and their body
--Wants to lose weight permanently
--Wants freedom from food obsession
Contact Charlotte today to learn more at 800.496.7710

Eating for Two... Concerned about my weight

Dear Charlotte,

I need your advice and help... I have always used food as a way to numb myself from the pain of a bad childhood and abusive relationships. I eat when I am sad or out of control. Sometimes food is my only friend.

I recently found out that I am pregnant (6 weeks), and my boyfriend and I are excited. It was unplanned, but I think I am ready to be a mom, (I am 29). I do worry a lot about food. I know I am overweight already, and that I have bad eating habits, and now I am eating for two, and I want to give my baby the best I can.

I am ready to make a change, but I need help. Where do I start?

Carol M. Indiana

Dear Carol,

Congratulations on your pregnancy, and best of luck with the baby. It sounds like you have a lot of things going on in your life, and it is important to take good care of yourself—especially since you are going to be a mom.

Bringing a new life into the world is a big responsibility. You have already shown that you are aware of how what you eat will affect the health of the baby, and this is a wonderful first step. I would like to work with you as your life coach, (we can do this over the phone) over the next several months so that when the baby arrives, you will have dealt with your food issues, (which clearly go deep and should be addressed) and you will be able to continue your new good habits and be a great example to your new son or daughter.

I applaud you for taking control, and I look forward to working with you during your pregnancy.

Charlotte Smith
Eating Consultant and Life Coach

Become The Real You will instruct you on how to listen to your own body. How to eat whatever you want to achieve and maintain your perfect body weight! No more diets, no drugs, no counting calories. It’s simple...and it works!

Become The Real You is a process is for anyone who:
--Is tired of yo-yo dieting
--Wants to return to their natural shape
--Wants to come to peace with food and their body
--Wants to lose weight permanently
--Wants freedom from food obsession

Contact Charlotte today to learn more at 800.496.7710

New Year's Resolution: Weight Loss

Dear Charlotte,

Happy New Year! I have made a New Year’s resolution to get control of my weight. It has slowly crept up over the last 10 years – marriage, babies, stress… And now I look at the pictures from the holidays and I don’t even recognize the woman with my family!

How can I get started and what kind of success do you think I will have?

Susan K.
Tampa, FL

Dear Susan,

Happy New Year. You are among 22% of women who make New Year’s Resolutions who have decided to lose weight, in fact 5 of the top 6 resolutions was health related (source).

My program takes a look at the cause of your weight gain, and then we focus of making that a healthy part of your life. I do not look at your specific eating habits or what you eat, rather we look at how food substitutes for something else in your life, or why you eat emotionally. You are a busy woman with a family, so we will look at how well you take care of yourself and go from there.

I don’t believe that diets work, or even that we should be obsessed with reaching a particular number on a scale. I tell you this because I do not use these things to measure success. I measure success with how well you feel, how happy and fulfilled you are, and how you have healthy relationships in your life. It has been my experience as a professional weight loss coach that when these things are brought up in importance, you will naturally take off extra weight and have a healthier body.

To get started, you just need to contact me. I always offer a complimentary evaluation. Go to the contact page of my site: http://www.secretsofslimpeople.com/ or call 704.340.7700.

Best Wishes for 2009.

Charlotte Smith
Eating Consultant and Life Coach

Become The Real You will instruct you on how to listen to your own body. How to eat whatever you want to achieve and maintain your perfect body weight! No more diets, no drugs, no counting calories. It’s simple...and it works!

Become The Real You is a process is for anyone who:
--Is tired of yo-yo dieting
--Wants to return to their natural shape
--Wants to come to peace with food and their body
--Wants to lose weight permanently
--Wants freedom from food obsession

Contact Charlotte today to learn more at 800.496.7710.

Addicted to Food

Dear Charlotte,

I have been addicted to food all my life. Food became my comforter, and has been a long time. Now, because of the weight I can hardly walk, and my muscles and joints ache. Yet even though I am in pain and can hardly breathe and I am more addicted to food than ever. I can no longer work and the doctor’s I have see just tell me I need to eat less and exercise—which I know, and yet this is the hardest thing to do. Is there any help for me?

Janice, South Carolina

Dear Janice,

You are clearly suffering from emotional eating—which is such a deeply engrained habit that it can be hard to break—but it can be done. The first step is to work through the reasons you use food to comfort you. You will have to be willing to open yourself up, but the rewards are remarkable, Please give me a call so that we can get started together as soon as possible.

My number is 800.496.7710 or email charlotte@secretsofslimpeople.com, and we can discuss your situation and take the next steps.

You may visit my website at http://www.secretsofslimpeople.com.

Charlotte Smith
Eating Consultant and Life Coach

Become The Real You will instruct you on how to listen to your own body. How to eat whatever you want to achieve and maintain your perfect body weight! No more diets, no drugs, no counting calories. It’s simple...and it works!

Become The Real You is a process is for anyone who:
--Is tired of yo-yo dieting
--Wants to return to their natural shape
--Wants to come to peace with food and their body
--Wants to lose weight permanently
--Wants freedom from food obsession
Contact Charlotte today to learn more at 800.496.7710.

Quitting smoking and weight gain

Dear Charlotte,

I have been trying to quit smoking for the last 5 years. In fact, I have quit several times, but I always start up again, and one of the reasons is because when I am not smoking I feel hungrier, eat more and then gain weight. What can I do so that I can quit smoking, but not put on a bunch of weight?

Sally

Dear Sally,

Many people transfer the addiction of smoking to eating. Eating for emotional reasons. What I teach is not a weight loss program. It is not the weight that is your problem. It is what is eating you. When you learn to make peace with food and accept yourself as you are right now, that is when you will melt down to your ideal weight. I’d love to help you strategize stopping smoking Sally.

Please call me at 800.496.7710 or email charlotte@secretsofslimpeople.com.
You may visit my website at http://www.secretsofslimpeople.com/.

Charlotte Smith
Eating Consultant and Life Coach

Emotional Eating

Dear Charlotte,

I know that eating is something that I do whenever I feel sad or depressed, or even anxious. I understand waiting to eat until I “feel” hungry, but I feel like I “need” to eat to feel better. How can I get past this dependence?

Alana D.

Dear Alana,

Many people use food like a thermostat. You get too happy you eat, you get too sad, you eat. You use food to keep you at an even emotional level. It is different almost every time you use food to cope with emotions. Emotional eating is caused by anxiety. I teach my clients to identify the hunger they are feeding. There are five hungers: spiritual, mental, social, physical, emotional. Then once we know the true hunger, I help them identify solutions to implement instead of eating.

I’d love to give you some examples and talk with you further if you would like to contact me at 800 496 7710 or email charlotte@secretsofslimpeople.com. You may visit my website at www.secretsofslimpeople.com.

Charlotte Smith
Eating Consultant and Life Coach

Become The Real You will instruct you on how to listen to your own body. How to eat whatever you want to achieve and maintain your perfect body weight! No more diets, no drugs, no counting calories. It’s simple...and it works!

Become The Real You is a process is for anyone who:
--Is tired of yo-yo dieting
--Wants to return to their natural shape
--Wants to come to peace with food and their body
--Wants to lose weight permanently
--Wants freedom from food obsession

Contact Charlotte today to learn more at 800.496.7710.