Concerned about Daughter's Weight

Dear Charlotte,

I am the mother of three and I have always had weight problems. My eldest daughter is a sophomore in college now and I can see that she is gaining weight. I try not to nag, or comment, but I just don’t want her to go through the same struggle that I have had my whole life.

Do you have any advice on how I can help my 19-year old stay slim?

Connie K.
Charlotte, NC

Dear Connie,

My advice to you is to focus on your own eating issues. So many daughters (and sons) develop unhealthy relationships with food because of unwitting and well-meaning parents. And just like all parenting, a child will model the behavior of the people they look up to… you!

Your daughter is a sophomore in college—19. She is probably under a lot of stress; she is undoubtedly eating poorly and probably not getting good regular exercise. But she is on the doorstep of adulthood, and she is in college to learn the life skills she will need to be a successful productive member of society. This is the opportunity for her to learn about taking care of herself.

Moreover, nagging, even talking casually about a teen’s eating habits and weight by a parent will almost certainly cause friction between the two of you, and perhaps cause a bit of rebellion and the opposite of what you want.

So, work on your own food issues, your emotional eating, and your general health. Be a good example to your daughter, and let her deal with her weight and eating habits on her own. When and if she wants to come to you to discuss this will you, be supportive, open, and non-judgmental.

…and when you send her a care package, include some healthier snacks like pretzels and dried fruits, granola bars and nuts! If she is like most college students, they will eat whatever is available, so make it healthy!

Give me a call at 800.496.7710 and we can start to work through the reasons you have always struggled with your own weight. I suspect that if we are able to address this, you will be better prepared to help your daughter when and if she asks, and at the very least you will be able to lead by example, and begin to lead a healthier life yourself.

All my best to you and your family. I look forward to speaking with you.

Charlotte Smith
Eating Consultant and Life Coach

Become The Real You will instruct you on how to listen to your own body. How to eat whatever you want to achieve and maintain your perfect body weight! No more diets, no drugs, no counting calories. It’s simple...and it works!

Become The Real You is a process is for anyone who:
--Is tired of yo-yo dieting
--Wants to return to their natural shape
--Wants to come to peace with food and their body
--Wants to lose weight permanently
--Wants freedom from food obsession

Contact Charlotte today to learn more at 800.496.7710

Dealing with Stress at Work

Dear Charlotte,

I have been dealing with a lot of stress at work, including long hours. I used to take walks on my lunch hour and eat healthfully, and now I just snack at my desk. During the last year I have gained a lot of weight, and I don’t feel as good about myself. When I get home I am so frustrated I just eat until I go to bed.

What should I do?

Michelle J.
New York

Dear Michelle,

For many people, food is a comfort when times are tough. It keeps us occupied, distracts us from facing difficult issues and consoles and sooths us when we are down.

But emotional eating, (eating as a way to suppress negative emotions, such as stress, anger, anxiety, boredom, sadness and loneliness) can lead to weight gain. And emotional eating often leads to eating too much, especially the higher calorie, sugary or salty foods that aren’t good for us.

The good news is that you have taken the first step to ending this cycle of emotional eating and taking control of your weight. You may not be able to change your stressful work environment, but you can change how you deal with it.

Your afternoon walks are a great place to start. The added exercise will help you clear your head and be able to deal with the afternoon better. You will be more productive, less stressed and the added benefit of being a great healthy habit that may help you lose a few of those unwanted pounds.

I would like to work with you more to help work through your emotional eating habits. If this is something you would be interested in, please give me a call at 800.496.7710.

Charlotte Smith
Eating Consultant and Life Coach

Become The Real You will instruct you on how to listen to your own body. How to eat whatever you want to achieve and maintain your perfect body weight! No more diets, no drugs, no counting calories. It’s simple...and it works!

Become The Real You is a process is for anyone who:
--Is tired of yo-yo dieting
--Wants to return to their natural shape
--Wants to come to peace with food and their body
--Wants to lose weight permanently
--Wants freedom from food obsession
Contact Charlotte today to learn more at 800.496.7710

Eating for Two... Concerned about my weight

Dear Charlotte,

I need your advice and help... I have always used food as a way to numb myself from the pain of a bad childhood and abusive relationships. I eat when I am sad or out of control. Sometimes food is my only friend.

I recently found out that I am pregnant (6 weeks), and my boyfriend and I are excited. It was unplanned, but I think I am ready to be a mom, (I am 29). I do worry a lot about food. I know I am overweight already, and that I have bad eating habits, and now I am eating for two, and I want to give my baby the best I can.

I am ready to make a change, but I need help. Where do I start?

Carol M. Indiana

Dear Carol,

Congratulations on your pregnancy, and best of luck with the baby. It sounds like you have a lot of things going on in your life, and it is important to take good care of yourself—especially since you are going to be a mom.

Bringing a new life into the world is a big responsibility. You have already shown that you are aware of how what you eat will affect the health of the baby, and this is a wonderful first step. I would like to work with you as your life coach, (we can do this over the phone) over the next several months so that when the baby arrives, you will have dealt with your food issues, (which clearly go deep and should be addressed) and you will be able to continue your new good habits and be a great example to your new son or daughter.

I applaud you for taking control, and I look forward to working with you during your pregnancy.

Charlotte Smith
Eating Consultant and Life Coach

Become The Real You will instruct you on how to listen to your own body. How to eat whatever you want to achieve and maintain your perfect body weight! No more diets, no drugs, no counting calories. It’s simple...and it works!

Become The Real You is a process is for anyone who:
--Is tired of yo-yo dieting
--Wants to return to their natural shape
--Wants to come to peace with food and their body
--Wants to lose weight permanently
--Wants freedom from food obsession

Contact Charlotte today to learn more at 800.496.7710

Cleaning out the Closets... Feeling Fat!

Dear Charlotte,

For the New Year, I have decided to go through my old clothes and donate or throw away the ones that don’t fit, or are worn out--and this is quite an undertaking!

I am one of those people that saves things forever, and I have a lot of clothes in my closet I have had for 20 years. I have noticed that there are a lot of clothes that don’t fit—are even several sizes too small and some that I only wore a couple times. I haven’t been worried about my size, although I know I have gained weight over the years, but looking at the pile of “too-small” clothes was a little depressing. Do I have to worry?

Franny H. Minneapolis

Dear Franny,

Congratulations to you for taking the initiative to clear out the clutter from your closets. It is healthy to go through your old stuff and get rid of things that don’t fit and you will never wear again—and it is healthy to not be concerned about your “weight” as long as you are contented about the way you eat and how food makes you feel.

Over 20 years a lot happens…styles change, and so do our bodies. Do not be depressed that these old clothes don’t fit anymore…you probably wouldn’t want to wear them even if they did! What is important is how you feel about your body and how you look in your clothes. Weight is a number, and it will go up and down. I do not like to focus on that, but rather the other things in life that are important: family, friends, health, happiness, and fulfillment. If you are content in these things, then be excited that you are gaining some more closet space and that you are de-cluttering your life.

Best of luck with your project.

Charlotte Smith
Eating Consultant and Life Coach

Become The Real You will instruct you on how to listen to your own body. How to eat whatever you want to achieve and maintain your perfect body weight! No more diets, no drugs, no counting calories. It’s simple...and it works!

Become The Real You is a process is for anyone who:

--Is tired of yo-yo dieting
--Wants to return to their natural shape
--Wants to come to peace with food and their body
--Wants to lose weight permanently
--Wants freedom from food obsession

Contact Charlotte today to learn more at 800.496.7710.

What is My Ideal Weight?

Dear Charlotte,

I am a 33 year old woman who is about 5’5” tall. How much should I weigh for my height?

Maggie M.

Dear Maggie,

There is no ideal or specific weight that you should be for your height. There are standards and measurements, but these do not take into account you—and all that that means.

What really matters is how you feel at the weight you are. Focus on fueling your body with food that makes you feel healthy and contented. Think about whether you are hungry before you eat, and how you feel after you eat. Don’t worry about the scale—the number will be right when you are ready to have a healthy relationship with food.

Charlotte Smith
Eating Consultant and Life Coach

Become The Real You will instruct you on how to listen to your own body. How to eat whatever you want to achieve and maintain your perfect body weight! No more diets, no drugs, no counting calories. It’s simple...and it works!

Addicted to Food

Dear Charlotte,

I have been addicted to food all my life. Food became my comforter, and has been a long time. Now, because of the weight I can hardly walk, and my muscles and joints ache. Yet even though I am in pain and can hardly breathe and I am more addicted to food than ever. I can no longer work and the doctor’s I have see just tell me I need to eat less and exercise—which I know, and yet this is the hardest thing to do. Is there any help for me?

Janice, South Carolina

Dear Janice,

You are clearly suffering from emotional eating—which is such a deeply engrained habit that it can be hard to break—but it can be done. The first step is to work through the reasons you use food to comfort you. You will have to be willing to open yourself up, but the rewards are remarkable, Please give me a call so that we can get started together as soon as possible.

My number is 800.496.7710 or email charlotte@secretsofslimpeople.com, and we can discuss your situation and take the next steps.

You may visit my website at http://www.secretsofslimpeople.com.

Charlotte Smith
Eating Consultant and Life Coach

Become The Real You will instruct you on how to listen to your own body. How to eat whatever you want to achieve and maintain your perfect body weight! No more diets, no drugs, no counting calories. It’s simple...and it works!

Become The Real You is a process is for anyone who:
--Is tired of yo-yo dieting
--Wants to return to their natural shape
--Wants to come to peace with food and their body
--Wants to lose weight permanently
--Wants freedom from food obsession
Contact Charlotte today to learn more at 800.496.7710.

Losing that last 5 pounds

Dear Charlotte,

I have been trying to lose “that last” 5 pounds for a while now. I know I need to cut down on junk food and exercise more, which I have been doing but can't seem to lose it. I am clearly doing something wrong. Can you tell me how many calories I should be eating, or help me with a meal-plan?

Cathy M.

Dear Cathy,

My first question would be “why do you think you need to lose 5 lbs?” Too often I think we get caught up in the number. Do you feel good? Are you eating when you are hungry? I cannot help you with a meal plan, or the amount of calories you should be eating. These are very superficial things. You need to think about why you eat, and the best way to do this is to start a food journal.

Log not only what you eat and when, but how you feel before and after. Are you eating when you are hungry? Are you contented when you are done, or are you over-full? When you start to realize why you eat, and start listening to your body, you will lose that “last 5 pounds” if your body is meant to lose them.

Please call me at 800.496.7710 or email charlotte@secretsofslimpeople.com, and we can discuss what roadblocks you have to achieving your goals.

You may visit my website at http://www.secretsofslimpeople.com.

Charlotte Smith
Eating Consultant and Life Coach

Become The Real You will instruct you on how to listen to your own body. How to eat whatever you want to achieve and maintain your perfect body weight! No more diets, no drugs, no counting calories. It’s simple...and it works!

Quitting smoking and weight gain

Dear Charlotte,

I have been trying to quit smoking for the last 5 years. In fact, I have quit several times, but I always start up again, and one of the reasons is because when I am not smoking I feel hungrier, eat more and then gain weight. What can I do so that I can quit smoking, but not put on a bunch of weight?

Sally

Dear Sally,

Many people transfer the addiction of smoking to eating. Eating for emotional reasons. What I teach is not a weight loss program. It is not the weight that is your problem. It is what is eating you. When you learn to make peace with food and accept yourself as you are right now, that is when you will melt down to your ideal weight. I’d love to help you strategize stopping smoking Sally.

Please call me at 800.496.7710 or email charlotte@secretsofslimpeople.com.
You may visit my website at http://www.secretsofslimpeople.com/.

Charlotte Smith
Eating Consultant and Life Coach

Eating together...Losing weight together?

Dear Charlotte,

My husband and I are both considered “obese” and have been for some time. We know that part of our problems are that we eat together—so if my husband is hungry, I eat, even if I am not and vice versa. And we have tried every diet from grapefruit to Adkins and nothing has worked. In your coaching program, is it possible to work with two people at once? We believe that in order to be successful, we will have to be on the same program together.

Jennifer and Jack

Dear Jennifer and Jack,

Absolutely you can do the program together. I have worked with many couples. You are able to support and encourage each other and understand. You will both learn that you eat when you are hungry and not when the other person is hungry. There is also a way to pace yourself so that you may enjoy meals together. However there will be times that perhaps you will say to your husband “Jack, I’m just not hungry right now, but I’d love to have a glass of tea and talk to you while you eat”.

Please call me for more information 800.496.7710 or email charlotte@secretsofslimpeople.com. You may visit my website at www.secretsofslimpeople.com. I look forward to hearing from you and being able to help you, as a couple, achieve your weight goals.

Charlotte Smith
Eating Consultant and Life Coach

Depressed about Eating

Dear Charlotte,

I have a food question that I hope you can help me with... Why do I sometimes feel depressed about eating when I should be happy about it? There are times that I feel dread before I eat and even worse after I eat. I want to feel good about food and the way I enjoy it as if it were a gift instead of a vice.

Lawrence

Dear Lawrence,

I so understand what you are saying. We would have to look at what the “dread” is about to find the real answer to this question. Have you dieted many times before and then when you eat you hate yourself for eating and so therefore the dread comes up? Are you afraid to eat, afraid of gaining weight or afraid of being hungry? What is the story you are telling yourself. I would really like to explore this with you further. Eating is a gift and a pleasurable one. When you eat when you are physically hungry food tastes so wonderful. Let’s talk.

Call me at please contact me at 800 496 7710 or email charlotte@secretsofslimpeople.com.

Charlotte Smith
Eating Consultant and Life Coach

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Charlotte's Program: Too Good to be True?

Dear Charlotte:
I have been reading about your system and it sounds too good to be true. You are saying I can eat whatever I want and lose weight? I have tried a hundred different diets, and they all restrict something, and then I end up cheating. I have been overweight most of my life and I really need to make a change. Can you help?
-Susie M.

Dear Susie,
Susie, my program is not a weight loss program. It’s not about the weight. I teach people to make peace with food. When you do that you will melt down to your ideal weight. What’s good and true Susie is that you can eat whatever you want when you are physically hungry and stop at satisfaction and your body will melt down to whatever it’s ideal weight is. Your body knows what size it wants to be just like it knows what height and shoe size you are. Your body knows what size it wants to be to function optimally. You have to learn to listen to it.

We’ve been eating from the neck up, listening to our minds, letting other people (medical experts), diet experts tell us what we should and shouldn’t eat. Your body knows exactly what it wants to eat, when and how much. You just have to tune in to it. This is what I do for my clients: teach them how to listen to their bodies so that they learn to control when they eat. If this is something that you are interested in, I would be happy to talk to you, please contact me at 800.496.7710 or email charlotte@secretsofslimpeople.com. You may visit my website at www.secretsofslimpeople.com.

Become The Real You will instruct you on how to listen to your own body. How to eat whatever you want to achieve and maintain your perfect body weight! No more diets, no drugs, no counting calories. It’s simple...and it works!

Become The Real You is a process is for anyone who:
--Is tired of yo-yo dieting
--Wants to return to their natural shape
--Wants to come to peace with food and their body
--Wants to lose weight permanently
--Wants freedom from food obsession

Contact Charlotte today to learn more at 800.496.7710.